Big City Moon Woman

Below is an essay I wrote for my other blog but felt impelled to share it here too for those who want to read it. I was encouraged by the person who I wrote the essay on. It shows you that one should never say never. That when one (me included) redirect their energies it is amazing what one can do that was previously thought could not be done, whether conscious or unconscious thoughts.

We've all done it and as an example just this morning alone how many "I cannot do it types of commercial that deals with an inadequacy versus one's ability to be able to do something.? One day if I have the time I am going to count up how many say "no, no no can't can't can't, can't, unless you use XYZ otherwise you are doom to fail".

And the conditioning has rendered us too afraid or too unsure of our (and we all have them) & emphasize far too strongly what we cannot (so it appears). It doesn't mean necessarily that any particular commercial is out to get us, but its marketing what can I say?

The one that really struck me odd was (yup, one on weight loss) and I listen to this beautiful woman say that the reason she was using this particular product was so she "could like herself again". She was lovely and big. Though this commercial was better then most, I heard in the message not of positive support and proactive I am capable of resolving my challenge and want to be the best I could be, but more of passivity & helplessness (unless you use their product). And 3 out of 4 people on the commercials were women.

I kept on thinking what is wrong with this picture?
But of course these are all marketing ploys that have consistently worked otherwise we would not have a multi billion dollar industry. There are a few that have a positive spin, but still in the minority.

I for one do believe we should have support as needed and requested and where 2 or ore are gathered together, one can get support otherwise none of us would have been here.

It simply is for me so unfortunate that highlighting weakness and not a strength has not been terribly effective before but it works well to sell a product. I look at the people here plus on a host of other threads and or websites and see a fire of determination who though may fall down 7 get up 8, keep on getting up. But the ones who try and then stop as they do not have it in them because of the conditioning hopefully at some point will move again.

Now the story:

Today I ran into a former a business acquaintance of mine .

He was positively glowing and seem happier then I had ever seen him & I had to tease him a bit about who was the new love in his life.

Well turns out he had quite smoking several weeks ago and it showed! When I asked him how did he do it and turns out he had been in the hospital a few weeks ago and spent 8 days and did not smoke. He thought then "Well if I went 8 days without a cigarette I could just continue"...

And so he did.

He looks great, really great and tells me he is enjoying food, the wonderful tastes and has even cut back greatly on coffee and Coke. In the four years I have made his acquaintance he sometimes would subsist only on cigarettes, coffee and coke. And had tried to quit smoking for over 10 years. This was a person who had struggled for 30 of his 50+ years with alcohol and substance abuse, lost a leg in a shootout in his teens managed somehow to overcome his addictions but could not could not seemed to stop smoking.

Never could he maintain a loving relationship with a woman, he loved women, but like some people rebuff when a woman got to close and wanted rightfully so a more committed, loving relationship with him. This was a man that had a lot to offer but did not see that he was worthy to allow someone to love him completely and find fulfillment.

According to him he has a nasty temper and I have witnessed it twice myself, but have always known him to be able easily to humble himself and apologize for his actions. What ever shadows were chasing him all his life he seem not to be able to put them down and rest. This was a man who cam from a 2 parent loving home, had his needs met, but somewhere along the line from what little he felt free to tell me, he did not think he was worthy.

In school he was teased and mocked a lot as he is not a tall man and quite slender, but did have a certain attractiveness about him and my suspicion there was some envy on the parts of the one who persecuted him.

But at the end of the day, he did find something deep in him that first gave him the ability to work on the alcohol & illegal drugs and now cigarettes. I've seen him start & stop counseling so many times that none of his friends batted an eye when he would try again.
But he did it, he did try again.

And so can any on us whatever it is that is holding you back or down. Like the Chinese proverb "Fall down seven, get up eight" You just keep getting up and starting where you are.
You owe it to yourself and you owe it to the rest of the world to be the best possible human being you can.

His examples shows that when a person is ready, really ready, they will do it.

And how cool is that?