Never saw it coming this Weigh..This Gift

We got a little respite from the cold all week through the weekend so I am taking advantage of it.  Right now I am clearing my house literally as I prepare for this move.


  I just got through re potting some of my plants that are going to a friend who enjoys gardening.  I had to re pot as I wanted to keep my beautiful ceramic pots for a future time.

  I also thinned out some of my veggies in my outside garden.  I now have 3 large container pots of Kohl Rabi.  My green onions are coming up famously as well as the basil, I have not seen the broccoli bloom or bear fruit yet.  I should be able to harvest one more batch of my collards & mustard greens before the whole organic garden is donated to the food bank that graciously assisted me for the last several months. My garden served a purpose for me now that purpose will continued.  I wish I could figure out what to do with my compost.  It is not fully converted yet otherwise I could sack and send it on its way with the containers.


Any suggestions?


I would not have seen things going this way but at least I know it is the gift that will keep on giving!


And I burn some more calories today to boot!


I know I've released some more weight, I do not know how much yet as I do not have scales & I won't be back for my follow up visit with the doctors until the 1st week of January.  It is definite I did as my clothes are hanging off of me so that is a good sign.


Somehow I got off track from my walking which I so enjoyed although I've got movement in over the last month


If it is to be, it is up to me. Author Unknown

Weigh to be whole~ Small delights that add up

Brussel Sprouts or Brocolli? Any gardeners out there that can identify?
Brocolli or Brussel Sprouts?
Mustard Greens 10-13-10



I woke up feeling wonderful no obvious reason, I been smiling inwardly for the last few days.

One of my musician friends came by this morning with his handsome son on a father /son day and what did he do? Toss my compost around and cover it with a tarp so it can "cook". I should have a wonderful nutriently sound soil for my spring garden before too long.

Great thing to do and a great lesson for his son about aiding one's neighbor.

He also pulled out of my loft space above my closet my suitcases with all my fall winter clothes stored. Kinda funny thinking of doing that now since we are still having low 80's weather for a few more weeks.

But I figured while I had the muscle & someone able to climb the ladder I better take advantage of it.

Much to my delight as I tried things on as I was gathering things to give to the woman who has a food bank and thrift shop as donations, about 1/2 of the items I could not begin to fit in with the hernia now fits beautifully which means I have now returned to my 2007 weight! are tops & tunics I had purchased some clearance, some thrift that turns out to be too tight in the sleeves or stomach & I just held onto them.

Well now they are just like they are suppose to be. I loved the fabric and/or colors and had hoped for the day I could wear them. They sat for almost 2 years and I told myself if they did not fit by 2010 I would donate them.

One in particular I held onto for 2 years after making an impulse purchase. It appealed to me though I am not normally a ruffly kind of woman. But the shirring on the sleeves got to me as well as the color.

Another 1/4 are big and half to be altered. What is funny is on the grey tweed skirt, the only thing keeping it from sliding from my waist to the floor is my still swollen abdomen. It fits like it is suppose to since it was a riding skirt so it is to be fitted in the waist & flared as if riding a horse which I won't be any time soon

The remaining 1/4 is being donated as they are too big and not worth the expense and/or time it would take to alter. And someone can get to enjoy them. As of now I have quite a few things going to this woman's clothing shop (not for sale she gives them away to people who come there for food and many of her clients need other things too).

I know by spring that many of the things will join the donation pile as I move toward my goals, but at least I got a chance to enjoy them for a season and will be willing to let them go so someone else can enjoy them!

I just acquire a blender & a slow cooker, so now I can make smoothies! Its amazing what can bring you pleasure, eh?

I thinned out my green beans. While I had a few, they are not thriving because they needed to be thinned out weeks ago & I could not, so now while the sun is shining I will get them done!

My collard & mustard greens, brocolli, brussel sprouts and Kohl Rabi are coming along nicely. It will be awhile before I can harvest but they survived my transplanting! This morning I also planted green onions, collards & red onions

Funny I intensly dislike mustard & collards as a child but love them now.

Last night I had shrimp curry with rice. It was really good. I opened the fortune cooking and saw the word "wait" on it. It was not the fortune it was the reverse side, but I thought it was interesting as that is what I am doing...

I would like to solve the mystery of which pot has brocolli and the other brussel sprouts. I know in another 60 days when it is time for harvesting I will know but I want to know now.

Weigh to Grow~ Eating from your harvest...

What a delight I had when today after finally a full night of restorative sleep, to, very carefully, get out & walked in to see how my garden grew despite my neglect due to the surgeries & convalesing.

Much to my delight I found an abundance of eggplants and 3 okra pods! Okra. At this size I will let them go to seed for next years crop. I was simply amazed that I got some since when I got the plant it was near death.



Eggplants~I harvested a dozen "Casper" eggplants to use and had to toss about 6 in the compost.


Cantaloupe

Green Bean plants w okra leaves


To the seasoned gardener it may not seem like much, but I had resigned myself that I had completely lost my container garden between the New Orleans heat, my neglect etc. Even my watermelons seems to have, no pun intended, taken a life of their own and started growing!

I manage to have saved one cucumber & squash plant respectively & the bell peppers seem to be trying to revitalized. My greens, brussel sprouts, kohl rabi & tomatoes are raring to be transplanted.

Not unlike me right now.

Although there wasn't a whole lot I could do, I can stand there to water, pluck away dead leaves & photograph.

And that is exactly what I did. Enjoyed the cool early morning breeze, the silence and my garden.

Tis' good!

Weigh to Hold~ From this day Forward

"No I am not a surrogate mother. I am not pregnant. It is a hernia. It has weighed me down (but not out)!
Moon o her porch needing TLC with hernia-Frontal.
Moon in her garden. It was blazing hot that day so my poor babies were wilting. (Yes I did water them)! 7-28-10
The plants like me needing some TLC

My front porch with the new plants that could use some TLC from Freecyle


Every man is going to have problems & sometimes he can be the problem for you"~N.N



No I am not blogging about men. This is about attitudes and how people that can make assumption that while initially are, I hope, without malice or intent to cause harm, can ultimately harm you.

I've spoken of it numerous times on my blogs of my challenges & frustrations, not so much about releasing weight, but more observational of life & culture and people as I continue to grow myself.

In less then 2 weeks I am schedule to have surgery to repair something that should have been cared for almost 2 years ago, but because of bias on the part of some professionals (and yes educated ones are not exempted from bigotry) access to badly needed surgery was not forthcoming..

I've had to pay for it in compromised health, economical & a wear on my heart & spirit. As of now I am so full literally & figuratively to the point there is no more room.

Literally, right now I am spilling my guts. I have what is a hernia, but it is not "just a hernia". If I was an elephant my abdomen would be right about the 2nd year gestational period for birth. The only thing that is preventing my intestines from spilling all over the floor (which would make an inconvenient mess) is my skin.

I went from an active, happy for the most part, humorous professional artist to someone who is now operating at perhaps on a good day 25% of where I was a few years ago.

All behind something that was fixable then & fixable now.

Over the course of the last 2 years, I've heard it all: People making assumptions about why you are the way you are to outright blaming while you suffer somehow holding you responsible for something that absolutely was not in your control.

Make no mistake, I do not see myself as a victim, so please do not make assumptions.

I have decided from this day forward as I continue to document this process since I 1st developed this hernia that now I will be very public from the surgery to recovery to reclamation to joy.

Despite what people may assume, I KNOW that once this is corrected I can correct all the rest.
I've been working on "the rest" for awhile, but with restriction because of the badly needed operation. It shouldn't have gotten to this point, but it has. It did. And it will be cared for.

One cannot unring that bell...

What is a weight issue will be far more manageable then it is now. I've gain 50 pounds simply from the inability to be very active. I have lots of limitations in my activity level right now because of a very real danger to my health until this surgery is done.

The surgery, I kid you not, once done, I will lose two dress sizes simply because of the distension. Several weeks down the pipeline , if all goes well, I will have my energy level back where I can be more physical. I've already been advised by the surgeon NOT to lift anything heavy for several weeks until fully healed & I will take him at his word.

I took these pictures of me the day I saw the surgeon so I can track & monitor my progress. My neighbor was kind enough to do it full frontal and side view. I wanted people to see what I look like. Perhaps for some they will believe me when I say "I'm not fat, I have a hernia" or if I am in a good mood "I am not pregnant, its a hernia".

It won't matter in the long run whether people will believe me or not. I've learned you cannot argue with beliefs. Beliefs are not often based on reality but on a person's attitudes, biases or their life's experiences and has little to do with you.

I just know from this day forward I will not be silent nor will I allow others to mar my life with their beliefs that can potentially cause me harm. I may not be able to stop all of it but I can surely stop a lot of it.

I've been enabled to gather knowledge, to learn a lot of what I did not know and reconfirmed what I knew and now I can put them into my own action plan & my vision statement.

I am in no rush. It is not a competition for me. I expect some missteps and definitely mistakes.

I have already redefine myself while here in eating, health & well being.

I've watched others in their triumphs & joys & also in their setbacks, but continue to get up.

I do not like the word "journey" It is so overused and for me when I see someone using it weigh too often I think "oh oh they are setting themselves up for failure" based on the context they use the word "journey".

But hey if it works for them, so be it.

For me, I am not going anywhere, I am exactly where I need to be.

I will spare you what the hernia looks like in its entirety, so you still will not be able to see all of it, only what is pronounced in clothing which makes it understandable why people assume wrongly I'm just fat.


A part of what is helping me immensely has been gardening. Great for your well being. A great stress reducing. A wonderful group in New Orleans, the New Orleans Food & Farm Network
www.noffn.org has been instrumental in my getting a container garden started. This wonderful group should be investigate and those of you are donors and financial angels should check into this a a cause sending your charitable dollars to aid them to do even more!

Like many non-profits, they are struggling with budget cuts, but wealthy in aid & assisting others to have access to healthy food right at their fingertips which will benefit us all in the long run.

If you are in the New Orleans area you should check them out. In other places you probably have a similar program where there are groups who will help you put in a garden as they believe it is an inalienable right we should all have accessible healthy food that is affordable.

My morning ritual is to tend to the watering, feeding & plucking. It almost puts me in a meditative state & helps me to manage my blood pressure and cope with all the external stress. Having the healthy food is almost the lagniappe ( a little extra) from this. I started gardening again2 years ago when this nightmare.

This morning I acquire because of Free Cycle: www.freecycle.org a potted okra plant, passion flowers, chives and morning glories plus empty pots & a raised bed to transplant. I am like a kid in a candy store!


"Comfort & prosperity have never enriched the world as much as adversity has. Out of pain & problems has come the sweetest songs & the most gripping stories"~ Billy Graham

You Grow Girl!

For those who are interesved in having healthy food you grow yourself to help in your weight release plan, check out this site www.yougrowgirl.com

I am here NOW~

"Well Done is better then well said"~ Benjamin Franklin

Right now I am feeling pretty good after getting about 7 hours of sleep last night after dealing with 2 nights of no sleep at all. What a difference it has made in my disposition today. While that level of no sleep is not a frequent visitor to me, I do have periods where no matter what I do I may only average 3-4 hours. it is during that time I work at being kind to myself, not making major decisions as I know something is on my mind & while at that moment I may not know what it is, it'll come to consciousness soon. I also in that kindness have learn not to have junk food in the house or even grocery shop as I know I will make emotional food purchases as I am tired.

But today I am dining at home from a place called Laughing Planet Cafe, a local restuarant told to me by the woman who helps me in the garden. LPC has a website www.laughingplanet.com with other locations in Oregon. Being that I am here, right now, I am giving the food a try, even having a smoothie called Blue Suede shoes filled with blueberries,honeydew,bananas, cantaloupe, apple juice.

Check out their website! I love their support of buying locally, leaving the smallest enviroment footsteps, and having bold tasty food that is affordable (my what a concept) & no affected snobbery to boot!

Yesterday was a day when I planned to grocery shop, but I did not go. Fortunately I had more then enough healthy food that could last a few days so I would not make poor decisions for the panty. I did however stop at KFC and bought a chicken dinner and I do not mean the baked chicken. I did pick the more healthier sides corn & coleslaw. I knew I was frazzled & badly needed sleep. What's important to me is I was conscious and if I selected I ate it enjoyed it and now will not do it again.

My intentions are not to do things in extremes. I am not a food purist or one who is releasing weight and having an affected snobbery toward ones who may satisfy a craving or have no interest (right now) into becoming a vegan or whatever. We all know we did not get this way overnight nor will it go a'weigh overnight. Punishing ourselves or others forming needless alliances, having comptetions for me neither helps or work.

I am not a comptetive person.

Not that I am not a person who is afraid of a challenge or not being the best. We have the attributes in varying forms in all of us, but perhaps for me it may be emotional laziness as I just do not see the point. I did then and still now believe that a contributory portion of our physical challenge with weight has very little to do with physical food but what is eating us. And we aready have a lot on our figurative plates that it makes no sense to add things needlessly.

And it does not have to be the things that are the fodder of many a talk show or self help groups though it could be. I do see from a big picture standpoint that we could far more easily release weight the we can in releasing what may be eating at our heart & soul bu that people do have, with some having to dig harder then others, have what it tkaes to figure out what works for them.

Hence the reasons why some people after reaching their goals can slip back regaining or being so overwhelmed with how others treat them post weigh lost or their identity going away with it. So now I am doing things bite size or even micro bites as I need it and I retrain or introduce new habits. One of the things I do is give myself something when I reach a milestone physically, enotionally, professionally or what have you. It could be something super small or something (for me) huge.

One gift I have that is an ongoing creation my own secret garden in my very tiny courtyard.

Yesterday & hopefully finishing today I am having someone plant lavender, pansies,rhonderderons, irises, begonias & peonies . Majority of the garden is all white flowers with splashes of deep purple and red as a even smaller accent (for pops of color) sprinkled all around. And now I undersvand she is bring a herbologist/botanist so we can identify some of the plants that are growing in my garden not needing my permission to do so.

I've been asked with some puzzlement in their voices as to why I was doing this since I was planning to move back to New Orleans in a 2-3 months. My logic is: I am here NOW.

Gardening, even just the mere act of watering gets me outside, the fragrances soothes my heart (and my blood pressure) I get needed Vitamin D from the sun and it just looks gosh darn pretty. I've now taken to leaving my draperies open to this fenced in courtyard so when I do arise early which is normal for me the 1st thing I see is the garden.

I feel like my creative juices are flowing again more then they have had in the last year especially living in a place where I have met very few people and have no outside activity(too long a story-or perhaps save it for another time).

One of the things I am doing to do is creating my own stepping stones with my art and maybe a phrase of one of my poems on them. Whoever get this place after I leave this tiny studio hopefully will get some delight from the gift I am leaving them from being here NOW.

So now a new cafe, new flowers, good smells, vitamin D & a herbologist. Pretty good for today, eh? What more can a person asked for today sans a round trip ticket & a check for New Orleans today?

How cool is that?